Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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