I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Randomize
