is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
