I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
