We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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