I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
There are leaves in my underwear?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
