I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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