a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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