Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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