? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
