last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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