You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
