Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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