We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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