My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I'm both gender and math confused
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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