Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
