i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Randomize
