party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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