I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
