Cold hands, warm shart.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
