exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
