Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
