I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
