Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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