my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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