Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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