I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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