Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
