Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize
