Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
