he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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