I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
