1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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