You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
