someone get that fucking seahorse.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
