id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I have aggressive nipples.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
