It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
