Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
