Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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