I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
