school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
