yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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