i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
