He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
