He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
