I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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