Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
