Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I supernannyed him into submission
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
