it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
