is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize